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The Shag Sums It Up

Greetings Fanatical Ones,

The request from headquaters was brief and met by a man that deeply regretted switching from lager to Captain Morgan's at 2am. Write a blog was the premise, but crucial details such as length and subject were strangely omitted. The fact that 'Blogging' these days has become so in vogue it could be a Madonna song was no deterant. As last years run to the flag by the Sydney Swans proved, this cat ain't afraid of no bandwagon.

But I found finding a subject was harder than an teenager who's stumbled upon his old man's porno stash. I figure I'd write about the hot topics such as the danger of stingrays in their natural habitat, but then deemed it just to soon. So I figure I'll stick to what I know and love and what mixes best with beer... Sport.

With finals footy upon us, it's probably fitting to start there. It looks like there's no stopping the Strom juggernaut, but season consistency does not win you premierships, post season brilliance does.

As for the cross country ballet, er, I mean AFL, it sure looks like the Flag isn't Victoria bound for yet another season with the top four being dominated by interstate teams. It looks like some good finals footy will be in order as all of these teams are capable of beating each other. Just a quick note to the Carlton lads who I'm sure are reading this, take a bow Fevs, all others hang your heads. You've got the leading goal kicker & the spoon. Those two things do not belong in the same sentence.

Onto the third code and to be perfectly honest it's basic arithmetic. The dirty Saffas beat the boys in black. We beat the dirty Saffas 2 games on the trot. Equals the Wallz as the best team in the tri nations & can't miss world cup specials.

The big news in England at the moment is Paki captain Inzamam Ul-Haq.

You don't have to see the huge holes in the pockets of Inzy's cricket whites to label him a ball tamperer. I believe his innocent just as sure as i've been a Sydney Swans fan for life. I feel the skipper decided to pick the seam in protest of the British commentators who spent the entire England-Pakistan series talking about the upcoming Ashes.

Being one to never ignore a good segway, it's safe to say that everyone's getting pretty excited about the battle for the bunch of burnt stumps in a minature urn. All the talk amongst the Poms is of the new spin bowling wiz kid Monty Panessar. They're pretty excited that a left arm orthy getting a bit of turn and figure he'll be the their sercret weapon. If they want to see real turn they best take notes from our not-so-secret weapon Shane the shiek.

My best guess is that Monty's gonna throw down that many pies this summer the Aussie 12th man's gonna get tired of running out sauce. And have you seen this guy field ?? He makes Phil Tuffnel look like some kind of freak Jonty Rhones-Cattle Dog hybrid.

But at least I know if this series does get a little dull as the Aussies push out to an unsurmountable 3-0 series lead. We can inject Darrell Hair into the series to spice things up a little. He'll be far from Singh-ing Monty's praises. He'll probably no ball the poor fella for bowling with a turban. That's my coupla cents.

The Shag.
Tue 12/09/2006 Purple Shag 337 views

3 Comments about this article

  • Panessar will be the victim this summer. 50,000 half cut Queenslanders will start the trend believing him to be New South Welshman. The flow will continue to Adelaide where any man's wife will ask her husband what time their sister wants us around to watch the highlights. By the time it gets to Perth Jesus!

    Posted by James Ashton Wed Sep 13, 2006 01:21am AEST
  • Purple rain dude, purple rain. Rain down on me

    Posted by Peter Butler Thu Sep 14, 2006 06:01pm AEST
  • Typical Queenslander attitude Jimmy ?? what is this half-cut notion you speak of. How about you loosen your skirt a little - have a real go - and get properly legless like any cricket fan South of the border. By the way it's spelt BEER so stop writing XXXX you fool.

    Posted by Purple Shag Thu Sep 14, 2006 09:57pm AEST

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