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For Sale


  • Open topped tour bus (ideal for hubristic "Victory Parade" or similar)
  • Four-hour booking of Trafalgar Square (booked months ago, now not required)
  • 2 tonnes of confetti (used once only)
  • 10,000 copies of CD recording of 'Jerusalem' sang my English cricket team (need to offload ASAP; make good coasters)
  • Autobiography book deal "How Good Am I??" with top London publisher (no longer required)
  • 40,000 miniature Union Jack flags (pre-ordered, now no takers)
  • Box full of MBEs, OBEs and other miscellaneous gongs (can't find anyone to pin them on)
  • Trophy cabinet (empty, used for only 14 months and won't be needed again)
  • Smug, self-satisfied smirk (recently wiped off)
  • Weekend for 2 at the exclusive 'Marcus Trescothick Private Retreat and Health Spa' (absolute seclusion guaranteed)
  • Everything must go!!

    All serious offers considered!!

    Enquiries to:

    Mr F Flintoff
    England & Wales Cricket Board
    London NW8 8QZ
    Tue 19/12/2006 Steve Rigby 1054 views
  • 4 Comments about this article

    • HAHAHA how sweet it is

      all the barmy army can go back 'to the rainy shithole' and make up new chants

      Posted by Wade Krueger Fri Jan 05, 2007 02:43pm AEST
    • very very funny
      its so true
      i like the marcus trascithick thing

      Posted by Nathan Grasby Tue Jan 09, 2007 01:06pm AEST
    • Well said ! I completely agree, once again the wrong decisions were made, AND again you whooped our ass like a kangaroo on the front of a toyota. learn how we lost in my blog see.

      Posted by Chris Clarke Wed Jan 17, 2007 09:21am AEST
    • AC MILAN V LIVERPOOL @ IMAX SYDNEY-THURSDAY 24 May 4am.$28. sms your email address to 0402 995110 you will be sent link to hosting limited.

      Posted by George Kokalevski Mon May 21, 2007 07:01pm AEST

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